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| there's a reason this is called depressathon. im disturbed right now!! for a bunch of reasons. my dad is in the hospital right now; today we had a critique, and basically my work sucks and i feel like im wasting my time and money. but i also feel that the expectations for me are a little high...considering ive never done photography like everyone else has. we are pressed on time, our assignments are due, and they keep telling us to shoot more, but we're in all day and night printing. i was supposed to take pictures of someone i met out here, but apparently he's forgotten or just doesnt want to. and i just found out everyone saw jake gyllenhaal at the donnie darko director's cut. :[ i feel like an ass calling spencer everyday..yeah that's not a big deal. but i just do. and i just want to be home with my real friends. i also need to find a roommate and i know liz is going to be pissed that i havent found one yet. argh. and just when i think i got a call from someone i want to hear from my sister has left a message nagging me. i have cockroaches in my room too. yargh. oh well, at least i found a computer lab and can waste my night here. depressathon july 26, 2004. | | |
| lately, ive been very bothered by my inadequacy. it seems impossible for me to matter to anyone. ANYONE. i want to know why. why am i inadequate? maybe i can fix it. i just need to know what it is first. it would be easy for me to come up with a list of things i find inadequate with myself, but what makes me inadequate to others is the bottom line of it. someone said i wasnt aggressive. but that hardly seems to encompass what's wrong with me. so what is it? let me know in comment | | |
| so julianne's going to strangle me for doing this --- bring it
britney spears>haley carroll>christina broat>lisbeth ortega
last cigarette: i dont know, one of those burnt out ones my dad left in an ash tray when i was 10 or something
last kiss: sometime the first or second week of january
last cry: oh man - practically did cry at Lost in Translation last night
last library book checked out: a literary critcism book for Jayson -- that he lost! it's okay - we have solidarity in being survivors of literary critcism classes
last movie seen: jackass late last night -- after seeing lost in translation -- kind of an abrupt transition
last book read: i dont know. i guess my textbooks - chaucer, poetry, schizophrenics in ireland, and history of archaeology
last cuss word uttered: i was quoting something to alex that involved the word FUCK
last beverage drank: inka kola [official peruvian drink!!]
last food consumed: un quarto pollo at el pollo inka!
last phone call: i think last night to ryan
last tv show watched: probably the cosby show -- i dont really remember
last time showered: this morning way too early at 8 am
last shoes worn: im wearing cookie monster slippers
last cd played: soundtrack to 28 days later
last item bought: supersized fries for a coworker
last soda drank: inka KOLA
last thing written: meh
last key used: backspace...as well
last word spoken: night
last sleep: OOOOH gooodnesss..so long ago. 8 am
last im: now
last ice cream eaten: i really wanted lucuma ice cream tonight. last ice cream i had was an ice cream sandwhich i bought at ben and jerry's
last time wanting to die: let's turn this one around to last time wanted to KILL. that would be when this lady came in and dumped out a bag of stuff onto the counter at victoria's secret and returned about 30 things on three different receipts and she didnt know which went to what and i wanted to stab a pen in her face
last lipstick: today - but in a joking manner
last time dancing: pirate party - pirates' hidden talent is dancing
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| I couldn't agree with myself more
SunDevilSS99: ya life sucks what can ya do?
you kill me: listen to sad music | | |
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